Tuesday, June 17, 2008

cleansing neither the inner nor the outer vessel

I don't know about you, but if I'm going to spend multiple thousands of dollars on my kitchen, it's not going to be on the floor. At least not yet. So I'm going to rush in, fool-fashion, where angels fear to tread, and paint my floor. Probably in green and white bee stripes, out of sheer cussedness. The one concession I'm making to the many people who've warned me against painting my floor is I'm not going to varnish it. That way if it gets nicked or scratched I can just repaint that spot, rather than refinish the whole thing. And the no-paint contingency screams silently "You moron! That's not what we meant at all!" But see above, re: cussedness. I'm a heedless sort, and I must take on projects of this nature.

I am deeply ashamed of our "garden" this year. I just let all the goat and bathroom and house problems get ahead of me, and now I have about 15 dead tomato plants--still in their pony packs--sitting on the side of my garage. Lettuce gone to seed, spinach totally eaten by the chickens, no peas, no carrots, swiss chard and collards growing in a sea of weeds, next to a row of I don't even know what, because the morning glory (wow, what an ironic name) has totally choked it out, and I can't for the life of me remember what I planted.

But John is taking Thursday off and it's Yard Day. We are GOING to till that spot behind the lilacs, we are GOING to cut down all the weeds along the irrigation ditch, we are GOING to spray weed killer where needed (while my conscience twinges me), we are GOING to weed the gardens, all of them if we can, and we are GOING to plant those tomatoes. I refuse to live without tomatoes in summer. I will rob Orvil and Patty if I must.

Meanwhile the bathroom moves steadily (see how I make the jokes?) along, and we have this:

The fixtures aren't in yet.

When the window is open it's like taking a shower in a forest, without all that pesky wildlife trying to get a "Captured On Film!" picture of the legendary Human Being to sell to one of their smutty animal-world tabloids.

I need to find a curtain to hang in front of what our neighbor calls "the turd-churner," then maybe buy a shelfy thing to store towels. We're going to epoxy the floor, I think. I will be very happy to wipe saliva, mucus, blood, vomit, urine and feces off of that floor, rather than off my bedroom floor. Even better? I will be very happy to put my boys in charge of cleaning that bathroom, since they will be the chief befoulers of same.


All8 said...

Love the look of a painted floor. There are some beautiful examples out there. Post pics when you're done.

Jill said...

Good luck with the floor! Don't feel too bad about getting do so much! Life will still be happy and sweet, even if you have to steal your produce and kill your weeds with poison....I think I will cross stitch that in a pillow for you.