Friday, August 1, 2008

ridiculous things that make me angry

The other day we were on our way down to the Steve Miller Band concert (yes, it did rock, thank you for asking--ooh, except for I don't really care for Joe Cocker and there was that part in the middle where some ape-armed dancing man TOTALLY HIJACKED the stage from Steve Miller and sang a bunch of songs with which I, a casual fan, am not familiar, BOO), and I saw that
maddening Red Robin billboard admonishing us to keep our hands at 10 and 2. You know, a little driving/two-handed burger pun. WHAT KIND OF PERSON EATS A BURGER WITH THEIR HANDS AT 10 AND 2? There are two ways to eat a burger; one-handed if it's small, or with your hands at 9 and 3. No sane person would distribute their grip unevenly, causing the hamburger innards to spill out the back (or front, as Dave maintains that the 10-and-2 grip is actually backward-justified, which I dispute, but that's neither here nor there). Come on, people! Who paid for this stupid thing? Because he should be fired. We had a lengthy, heated discussion about it at dinner (NOT at Red Robin), until Nate cried for mercy and begged us to change the subject.

Oh, wait. I just thought about it. I think I might actually eat burgers with the backward-justified 10-and-2 grip. THIS THROWS MY ENTIRE WORLDVIEW ON ITS EAR. I need to eat a burger now and figure this out.


All8 said...

Eating and driving is dangerous and gross, regardless of how you're holding it. Just think of where your hands have been and then touched the steering wheel. Now think of where all of the other hands have been that touched what you touched before you touched your steering wheel. Now imagine that all of those selfsame hands are now touching your burger.

Happy eating. ;P

Amy said...

This post got me all bugged about how I hold my hamburger. I mean, 10 and 2 makes no sense. I think you're right, 9 and 3 might be better. But, then again . . . Hey! Thanks a lot for making me ponder on your blather about hamburgers.