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Tuesday, March 10, 2009

chicken in the dead pan, picking up dough

Hey. Do you guys want to hear something gross? Shut up, you do too.

So, you know we have a motley flock of chickens. Our rooster Fauntleroy had his neck broken accidentally by Captain America, so the remaining chickens are Socks and Shoes (Easter Eggers), Toupee (a Cuckoo Marans), I and O (Buff Orpingtons), U (a cannibalistic Gold Sex Link), and Sometimes Y (a Silver Laced Wyandotte). Those who have left us via assorted methods for the happy scratching grounds in the sky are Shirt and Pants (Australorps), Broccoli and Cauliflower (Blue Laced Red Wyandottes), and A and E (White Leghorns). There was also for a short time a Blue Laced Red Wyandotte rooster named General Turgidson.

I'm getting to the gross part, be patient. Since we live out here in redneck/hippie commune territory (depending on your inclinations), we have to be careful about raccoons and skunks. We have bricks lining the outside of the chicken run to discourage digging, and we try not to leave the gate open overnight. I think having Fauntleroy helped, too, because any fool who would try to get past him with malice aforethought would have a bloody disembowelling to show for it. But on Saturday morning we went outside and saw that there was a Leghorn who had met her untimely demise.

If it had been a raccoon, he would have only taken her head and moseyed on his wanton way. Wasteful! But this creature had eaten her head and her insides--with such fervor, in fact, that he had eaten up inside her until he got to her little egg-making factory, found the egg inside, cracked it open and eaten the innards. Gross! But you've got to give him credit for stick-to-it-ive-ness. He deserved the win. So that's a skunk for you. There were feathers everywhere.

We can't figure out how he got in, either. You almost need a wire floor for the pen, or they find a way in. We're going to call our neighbor who traps skunks and extracts their essence to come take care of it. What he does is, he straps them into a chair and focuses the light of the Dark Crystal on their eyes, and the stink just sort of drips out into little vials. The future today, I tell you!

3 comments:

tipsybaker said...

This is what I've been worried about. We are going to get chickens, but I've been wondering if I really have to excavate and put wire and bricks and all that even if the chickens are locked up at night. I guess I should.
That is a gross story, but I enjoyed it.
Off subject -- how long do you keep whey?

All8 said...

Not even. UGH! What in heaven's name does said neighbor do with the "essence o' skunk"? Um, maybe I don't want to know?!

Sorry to hear about your addition to the great dust bath in the sky.

hi, it's me! melissa c said...

Ya, know all about it. Bry puts a trap in front of ours. They're tricky little devils! I hate roosters though, can't abide 'em.