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Tuesday, June 1, 2010

hating cats

I don't want to be a catmother anymore. These are terrible kittens. They refuse to grow up and eat normal food, which they should already be eating by now, and I'm afraid they're going to be like those grown men who act like babies and hire prostitutes to change their diapers. Rex especially is maddening. Anytime I try to help him drink milk out of a dish he starts clawing and foaming at the mouth and trying to bite me. Then they kick shavings all into the dish and make a big mess of it so they can't eat it. Idiots. There's a part in a Simpsons episode where Moe says, "I'm a well-wisher, in that I don't wish you any specific harm." That's how I feel toward these kittens. I don't want them dead or anything, at least not by my hand, but I am quickly losing patience.

Just thought you should know that I'm the sort of person who hates kittens. And don't get me started on puppies and unicorns.

2 comments:

Melissa J. Cunningham said...

I found the best way to raise those awful things is to put them outside and ignore them.

My cat had kittens a few years ago and they turned out to be great mousers and very polite cats. Mainly because I wanted nothing to do with them and kept them outside. Maybe you're being too helpful? =) I don't know. Just a thought. We need to get our kids together. Mine like yours so much. Including that darling little one at the end! he he

All8 said...

You mean, they haven't made it to the pound yet? Crazy woman.