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Thursday, September 2, 2010

gonna use oil-based paint, 'cause the wood is pine

We have a couple of bare patches in our lawn where we pulled out our giant hideous juniper bushes at the beginning of the summer. In a few weeks there will be trees there, but right now they're just scabby dirt holes. When we pulled the bushes out we discovered that every stray cat since the beginning of time has been pooping under them. Now Skiver and Groceries and Rex want a piece of that sweet action and have ceased even the pretense of using the litter box.

We let the chickens out to eat grasshoppers, which they don't do. Instead they go scrape around in the shrub holes, and every time it's like, "What's this? Is it treasure? Is it a bug? Oh, it's poop. What's this? Is it treasure? Is it a bug? Oh, it's poop." This goes on for hours, and you can see the crescendo-diminuendo of anticipation and disappointment played out over and over again right before your eyes. It's like a Police concert writ small.

Should I buy a Henry Milker? I'm thinking probably so. I love hand milking, but there's no denying that it takes longer; the catching, washing, kicking, milking, finishing the grain, kicking, dipping, straining, cooling . . . it adds up. And when I've already got a busy morning trying to get (human) kids ready for school (waking, waking, waking, nagging, hiding, wearing dirty clothes, camping out in the bathroom doing hair, losing shoes, eating, hating breakfast, bus coming, refusing to run), it means that I usually (read: always) decide that buying raw cow's milk is the way to go, even though cow's milk is probably single-handedly responsible for everything evil that has ever happened. Ask the hippies! They'll tell you. And of course I don't like underwriting evil, so if there is an easier and faster way to milk my goat, that sounds good to me.

Speaking of the goats, we finally got in touch with Sir Yellsalot's proper owners and he's going to go away, away, away! He is going to make gorgeous babies, but I hope they aren't as loud as he is. He gets to live with some Jersey calves, and I bet having company will fix his wagon.

8 comments:

Melissa J. Cunningham said...

An entertaining post as always! Love following your life!

Barbie said...

I have a Henry milker and really like it though it isn't faster than hand milking my goat. Trillie likes it though and my hands don't get so fatigued.

tipsybaker said...

Sometimes when I least want to go out and feed and water the goats in the morning I wonder how much I'm going to want to go out and feed, water AND MILK the goats in the morning.

All8 said...

Interesting milker. Reminds me of my first breast pump. I hated that thing and it's &^$*&! suction principle. Good luck.

Eric said...

Loved the title! Who knew Lee Marvin could sing so well?

The Henry milker sounds like the way to go, even if it does look like a makeshift bong a college student at an Ag. University would make.

I wonder if you could make a bigger, four teat version with a foot pump for milking cows without electricity...

Layne said...

The non-electric is a big selling point for me. Also the non-straining. He says on his website that people sometimes buy two of them so they can milk both teats at once.

THE WILKER CLAN said...

OMG...get a farm boy & maid!!! that just made me tired...you are a WOMAN!!!:)

Kacy said...

I really want you to be able to milk two teats at once so I implore you to get two Henry milkers.