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Wednesday, April 25, 2012

don't push me 'cause I'm close to the edge, I'm trying not to lose my head

Last week was hard.  At another time I might have been better equipped to handle the scheduling grievances, the sudden death of a cousin, the bunny biting the nose off the other bunny, and the fellow parent who was a snotty shrew to me when I asked her if she'd be willing to help with PTA, practically shouting at me that she would have kids in TWO SCHOOLS! next year, boy what would that be like, I wouldn't know since I only have kids in three schools myself, could she not just refuse graciously?

But last week I also lost my grandpa somewhat unexpectedly, and I've been a wreck.  He defies description, because he is what they call "an original," and he was beloved by his entire family of six children, twenty-seven grandchildren, and forty-seven great-grandchildren, each of whom, along with those who have married in, felt like they were his favorite.  I miss him terribly.  This is the man who set up a target in his basement near the wood stove, and used to go stand at the bottom of the stairs and have shooting practice.  He taught me, and Grant, and countless other children, grandchildren, and great-grandchildren how to properly sharpen a knife, how to make willow whistles, let us take his four-wheeler down to the river to give the dog a bath, supported all of us in our concerts, track meets, plays, graduations, weddings, baptisms, blessings, mission farewells and homecomings, took us boating, fishing, hunting, camping, and cut unquantifiable amounts of firewood.  Once we were eating at a picnic table, and a wasp flew in and was crawling on the table trying to get into the food.  My grandpa smashed the wasp with his arm.  He was smart, funny, simultaneously kind and hard as iron.  He was like no one else, and if you think I'm not going to make a pendant out of one of the shell casings we found by the handful in his truck, then you don't know me very well.

5 comments:

beckster said...

Oh, Layne, what a wonderful yet tragic post. Just like life, huh? It is truly wonderful that you had such a colorful, loving grandpa, and it is tragic that you had to lose him. From what you have said, he must have lived and loved very well. What a rare example for you and your family! Your necklace idea sounds perfect. Please accept my condolences on your loss and your horrific week. This too shall pass away.

Tori said...

I thought it wasn't much like you to disappear for so long and worried that there was unpleasantness going on. I'm so sorry for your loss - your grandfather sounds like the kind of guy we should all aspire to be.

tipsybaker said...

What a tribute, Layne. You're such a wonderful writer. I'm so very sorry for your loss and I'm also very glad you're back.

All8 said...

A very nice tribute indeed. I hope that you're doing okay.

Jenny said...

So sorry to hear about your Grandpa. I didn't even know about it until Sandy came over to tell me why Zoe wasn't at piano. He sounds like such a wonderful man and I'm sure his loss hurts so much. Thinking of you much! BTW- I'd love to know what you ended up singing at your cousins funeral and how it all turned out!