Saturday, April 28, 2012

my love don't give me presents

John and I went out to dinner with his parents tonight.  It took a very long time to get our food, and our server sort of disappeared.  I think she should have been a better advocate for our table.  There was a guy at a table near ours, wearing a plaid shirt, small silver hoops in both ears, one of those soul patches that is a stripe from the lower lip to the chin, fratty, and I looked at him and didn't respect him.  The soul stripe was what did it, and the general frattiness of his behavior.  I do not approve of old people who dress and groom themselves like they are college students from a recently bygone era.  His date looked like a blonde Snooki.  There were surprisingly many people drinking Bud Light, even though the restaurant had five or six local award-winning beers on tap.  Is that strange?  Do people enjoy the taste of Bud Light, or do they drink it because they want something that tastes sort of like beer but won't make them fat?  As John put it, "If I were a beer drinker, I have a hard time believing that Bud Light would be my beverage of choice."  But what do we know, we're teetotalers.

I have been a big fat dynamo this whole week.  I can't even remember all the things I've done, so numerous are my feats of industry.  But there was goat training in there, and rabbit medicating and relocating, and strawberry jam making, and basement bedroom painting.  The goats are going to be all right.  I can feel it.  Remind me of this when Sally puts her poopy hoof in the milk bucket and I want to tear her throat out with my bare hands.

If anybody was unsure about how sharp rabbits' teeth are; if anybody has forgotten that Martha bit Sugar's nose off, then let me submit for your examination exhibit B:  Sugar bit the end off the antibiotic syringe.  Snap and it was gone, quick as a flash.  Once my sister Claire was holding a rabbit, and it bit her arm.  She freaked out and flung her arm out straight to make it stop biting, and the rabbit just dangled there in midair with its teeth sunk into her arm.  Gosh, there were so many warning signs.  Why did we get rabbits?


tipsybaker said...

What is your strawberry jam recipe? Is it a freezer jam?
I would never, ever drink Bud Light. Never. Which I guess means that I sometimes (sometimes) drink for the right reasons, which is to say, for the taste. Last weekend I was at a party and they had this beer on tap that was like nectar. I drank just one glass and it was completely satisfying and rich and refreshing, all at once. I don't love beer, but I understood suddenly why people do.

beckster said...

Like Jennifer, I would never, ever drink Bud Light. It is a watery, nasty, beer facsimile. I suspect people drink it because of advertising. After all, what will the sheeples refuse to buy/eat/drink with the right advertising? Sigh. A real brew is sublime.
Thanks for reminding me it's strawberry time. I need to get busy, it will be over before I know it.
I bet you know why you got rabbits if you think about it. They look so cuddly and cute. They have a great advertising agency!

Jenny said...

Ack! I have to make strawberry jam this week!!!! There are too many other things I want to do, but nothing beats homemade! I also want to know if you do freezer jam- that's what I've always done, and what pectin you prefer?

Tori said...

I've been known to drink a Coors Light or two on a hot day or under emergency conditions, but I have absolutely no idea why anybody drinks any of that crap under normal circumstances where other beers are available. But then again my favorite beers are the ones where you can practically chew the hops, so...

Jennifer May said...

You totally rock.....i now have a few more words to look up for the day! Love ya! Good seeing you last weekend.