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Tuesday, March 11, 2014

why does my heart go on beating, why do these eyes of mine cry


You know, we complain a lot, as a society, about our failure to create newer, bigger, better things and processes, e.g. "We can put a man on the moon, but we can't cure the common cold," or We can put a man on the moon but we can't make a plastic package that doesn't cut your hand open," or "We can put a man on the moon, but we can't make sandwich bread that doesn't get soggy."  The poor moon is often dragged into these scenarios, because we are collectively flabbergasted that we can do something very hard like leave our Earth's atmosphere, visit another celestial body, and almost always return in safety (I mean, depending on if you believe that we've actually done that, you Art Bell listeners out there), but we can't do something that seems comparatively simple, like making durable sandwiches.  So I think it's time for us to recognize the amazing advances that have been made in band-aid technology, specifically fabric band-aids.  Remember how terrible they used to be?  They used to come off as soon as you got them the tiniest bit wet, and you knew better than to try to save money with the store brand.  But I bought some Western Family band-aids last week for my toe, and they are great!  They stay on even when I soak them in water.  Good job, America!  This is the kind of thing that will return us to a position of economic strength.  I applaud your progress. 

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