Tuesday, March 10, 2015

get ready for the funcooker

Fitness question:  Will I burn more calories/build more muscle by sublimating my rage at my children's laziness and ingratitude, or by letting it burst forth in a froth of spittle-flecked invective?  Just because I want to take every opportunity to raise my heart rate/strengthen my core, don't you know.

This is where I should ask the question "How do you give your kids opportunities to explore their interests without turning them into me monsters?", but I'm not going to because it is a question that has no universally applicable answer.  All I can say is, well done, you parents out there who have struck that perfect balance that has brought you kind, thoughtful, well-rounded, inquisitive children.  It must be nice for you.

I guess it's negative of me to talk like that.  My kids are good, I'm just at an ebb in career satisfaction right now because I didn't want Grant to go to basketball in the first place because he has this stupid cough that won't go away, and his Spanish teacher told him not to come back to school until he's better, and then John didn't think it was a big deal for Grant to go to basketball, and Grant begged and I gave in like a good parent never does, and here it is almost 10:00 at night and guess who's still up even though he agreed to be in bed by 9:15 because he's sick and needs his rest?  Grant, that's who.  And Willa came home from school and snuck out to play with the neighbor girl without doing her homework or piano practice, even though she called me from school and complained about having a sick stomach, and I couldn't get her since the car was in the shop having a well car checkup for eight freaking hours, and I don't think Emmett has practiced his piano for more than an hour total in the last month, and I know for sure he does a crappy job of feeding and watering the goats every day, like it's so hard to turn on the hose, and Ike jammed his finger at recess yesterday and will talk about nothing else but how much his finger hurts, and how the Tylenol at the doctor's office tasted (sick), and how the Ibuprofen at our house tasted (fine) and if the finger can bend more or less than yesterday, and how often does he need to change the gauze, and is the purple bruise on it bigger or smaller than yesterday, and if it is puffier or less puffy than yesterday, and what was his level of pain at various points throughout the day and finger finger finger finger until I shoot myself just to have some peace and quiet with nobody asking me for anything, not even gum at the checkout stand.


tipsybaker said...

Steady on! Owen hasn't practiced trombone more than an hour in the last year. DIdn't you write something about trombonists recently? Something yucky?
I think losing the temper is better for not just for calorie burn, but overall health.

Layne said...

Yes! They drip spit all over everything! Trumpets and baritones spray it everywhere, so that's not any better . Brass instruments are sick.

Sometimes you have to lose your temper just so you know you're alive.

tipsybaker said...

Ugh, I see I put an extra "for" in my comment. The day is ruined.